Accursed sheets and automatic pages
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Accursed sheets and automatic pages

"Should we take it as a bad omen that the Australian Tax Office lodgement website crashed on the first day of the new financial year?" asks Jack Dikian of Mosman.

Describing it as "Mal Jono and Vic make a jigsaw", George Manojlovic of Mangerton "thought Peter Miniutti's idea (C8) was a ripper, so I did the cut-up of page one of the Herald and tossed it in the air. It fell to earth as The Synny Melding Hoarder pedantine lawns day. The actual news was gobbledegook, the pictures would have pleased Picasso, but at least there were no bits missing".

Today's pedantry from Don Leayr of Albury: "Why do people keep using the word 'incidences' when they mean instances, or incidents?"

Phil Harvey’s conundrum over 'This page is intentionally blank" (C8) raises another question for Brian Pymont of Frenchs Forest. "Such a page isn’t 'intentionally blank'. It’s not blank at all because it contains the wording 'This page is intentionally blank'."

Richard Kirby of Campbelltown believes he must defend the printer that cannot speak for itself. "The blank page (C8) is caused by operator error. When you type a full page, the computer automatically inserts a page break to a new page. People do not recognise this has happened and insert a manual page break, thus causing a blank page to be inserted. A quick review before printing will show the blank page and it can be deleted. A bad workman always blames his/her tools."

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"Perhaps it is time to mention that the Irish name for jellyfish (C8) is 'smugairle róin', meaning 'seal snot'," suggests Margaret Hamon of Bawley Point.

The opposing argument for sheet recycling (C8) comes from Thelma Frost of Mudgee, who does not hold back. "Have any of those advocating a seam in the middle of a sheet ever slept on one of the cursed things?"

Trevor Townson of Leichhardt has found another neologism to despise. "When did an increase or a rise become an 'uptick'? I must have missed the memo. Perhaps the need to 'hero' the main ingredient in order to impress on Masterchef was also actioned in the same message?"

Stored elastic (C8) follows the old rule of 'if you don't use it, you lose it', according to Joy Cooksey of Harrington. "Important to remember in times of slack 'lock-down' fashion trends when everything is likely to go, or be locked away."

Column8@smh.com.au

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